School Counselor's Page

Dearest BCD Families,                                                                               March 2020
 
I hope that this letter finds all of you well and successfully establishing some structure within this new normal that we are all working to navigate. Personally, this surreal experience has brought reflection, and more than ever, I have all of you and your children in my heart - and golly do I miss their faces and their abundant energy. I look forward to when we can all congregate in person again, but in the meantime, I also look forward to learning and exploring together how we will remain connected over the following weeks. As classroom teaching will look and feel different, so will counseling. And as we evolve through trial and error in the classroom, I expect the same for my role. The number one thing to remember, is that I am here! I am here to support you in all the ways I always have been. Do not hesitate to email me with questions, concerns, feedback, shares… I welcome it all!
 
At this point, I plan on joining morning meetings and advisories in real time, on a rotating basis. I want to see the kids and connect with them.  When I attend these groups, I anticipate I will at times be joining as a participant, and other times be leading- like Kid Power class. Coincidentally, my main theme of the year has been working with students on mindfulness and self-regulation skills… skills that will come in handy now, as we all work to maintain our mental health and life balance. I will also be holding office hours each day. Students can reach out through email to set up times. I have no idea what the demand will be, so I will adjust as needed to try to meet the needs of all the students.  I will have office hours daily by appointment. Please know that Zoom/ phone/ email interactions cannot be guaranteed confidential. Regulatory agencies are allowing looser standards during this time so that therapists and counselors can meet the needs of clients in this unusual circumstance, but I do want to be clear that confidentiality cannot be guaranteed, and that consent for student counseling is still required. 

Please say hello to your children from me and tell them I can’t wait to see them at virtual school! 😊
 

Note to families regarding BCD Counseling:

Sterling Kranjcec continues to be available during this time of BCD Connect learning to provide support to students. Given that the conversations between students and counselor will be virtual, and the nature of the role of the school counselor, she will be able to provide support and guidance but will not be offering therapeutic treatment. If you need assistance in finding a therapeutic referral, she will be glad to help connect you with someone.

My Office Hours

I will be offering Office Hours daily by appointment. Please use the below calendar app to schedule time with me.

Resources

I realize this may look like a lot. Breathe… and know that it is here for you if you need it. The ACIS counselors have been working together to find the best resources, and we want you to have them but not be overwhelmed by them. Use as needed.

Social Emotional Learning

List of 5 items.

Adult Learning

List of 3 items.

Managing the Side Effects by Thriving During This Time Together

Lastly, here are some tips from a dear and esteemed colleague, Craig A. Knippenberg, LCSW, M.Div., who serves as the mental health consultant for St. Anne’s Episcopal School (ACIS) in Denver.

Surviving the Coronavirus at Home: Managing the Side Effects by Thriving During This Time Together
  1. Structure. Adults generally find that routines help us be more efficient. While we might like routines, children need them. Sit down with your children and map out how the days will flow. Set up specific times for reading/homework, chores, independent free time, mealtimes, family time and bedtime. Like every teacher, write it down and post the schedule.
  2. Time for Self. Make sure your children know that you will plan blocks of time for yourself and that they will need to self-entertain. This will give you time for needed chores and your own mental-health time. Have several a day and work in times for your own self-reflection, checking in with other parents and exercise time. While these time segments will be shorter if you have preschoolers, make sure your children know that disturbing your time will result in a loss of privileges.
  3. Free Play. Being outside in fresh air has huge physical and mental health benefits. While children might complain about not knowing what to do, they will quickly find something to explore or create while outside. If the weather or your living arrangements don’t allow for outside play, try creating one room on the house where kids can just have free play and make a mess.  You can also set up Zoom sessions for your children and their friends. This is also a great time to break out old hobbies and jigsaw puzzles.
  4. Electronics. I recommend that families have a limit of a half hour of gaming during the school week and several blocks of gaming time on the weekends. Given these circumstances, I’d probably go with the weekend rules just to help you and your kids survive. The same is true with TV, while binge-watching might be an appealing alternative, you’ll pay the price in your child’s moodiness after you pry them free of their screens. Several one-hour blocks a day is better than binge-viewing.
  5. Family Games. This is the perfect time to get out all those old-fashioned board games. You’ll have a lot of fun just playing and laughing. Even older teens and college students will engage in the fun as they remember times from earlier in their lives. Watch TV together or share an electronic game or two. This would also be a great time to watch old family videos. Connecting with happier times is always good for our mental health.
  6. Sleep. While it might be tempting for your older children to stay up late every night and sleep late every morning, that’s not going to be beneficial to their physical and mental health. You’ll also be left with very moody children the next day. Stick with your bedtime schedule. Don’t forget to enforce no screen time an hour before bed.
  7. Your Community. Rather than being on the phone or social media all day long yourself, try to schedule set times to check in with your adult friends. You can also consider setting up a Zoom community of friends where you can have a designated time to check-in with each other.
  8. Limit the News. For your own mental health, and the mental health of your children, titrate the intake of news. Constantly following the latest Corona news will only increase the entire family’s anxiety.
  9. Discuss Emotions. Have a set family time to talk about how everyone is feeling and coping with the outbreak. I’d suggest doing this at the dinner table or after dinner. It’s important to acknowledge their anxiety but also their loss and grief about upcoming trips and school programs on which they will be missing out. Then turn to your family game time and your usual routines. Children need to learn how to block out their anxieties and experience a sense of normal.  It’s getting back to those routines that help us survive.
  10. Adjust to Your Unique Child. The above recommendations need to be adjusted to the age and nature of your child. Children who struggle with impulse control, will need more structure and rules than your well-controlled child. Teens will need to be in contact with their friends over social media. While you’ll need to extend their social media time, still have smart phone free times during the day and take the device at night.
  11. Have an Adventure Mindset. In good times and bad, help your child understand that every moment in life, offers opportunities to learn, create and grow.
  12. Reach Out to Others. Sure, we need to socially distance ourselves, but that doesn’t mean we can’t help our friends and neighbors.  Getting involved and expressing our empathy helps us all.
In closing, it’s important to remember that this is a unique time for all of us so it’s important to go easy on yourself. While I typically recommend that parents try and be 80% consistent with their parenting strategies, this, however, will be one of those times when you will need to let some things go. It’s ok; this is a parenting experience to which we are all trying to adjust. Just do your best until the Coronavirus runs its course.
For additional support, Craig will be hosting a series of live webinars with practical advice and tips about parenting during the coronavirus pandemic. For more information, visit www.craigknippenberg.com/COVID19 or go to Facebook @ColoradoMentalHealth.

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Craig A. Knippenberg, LCSW, M.Div., is the mental health consultant for St. Anne’s Episcopal School (ACIS) in Denver. He has provided child and family counseling services for more than 35 years and is the founder of Knippenberg, Patterson, Langley and Associates, one of Colorado’s largest private practices (www.CraigKnippenberg.com). Experts for this article were taken from his new book Wired and Connected: Brain-Based Solutions To Ensure Your Child’s Social and Emotional Success (Illumify Media Global, 2019) www.wiredandconnected.com.  You can also check out his blog at: www.adventuredad.org.
 
Boulder Country Day School    4820 Nautilus Court North • Boulder, Colorado 80301 • Phone - 303.527.4931 • info@bouldercountryday.org
Boulder Country Day School, where academic distinction meets education with character. BCD is a top rated, accredited private school in Boulder, Colorado where every child has the opportunity to discover their own unique excellence. Distinguished by small class sizes, outstanding faculty, engaging academics and a focus on community, our preschool, elementary and IB middle school teachers strive to create a well-rounded educational environment that balances traditional subjects with the arts, world languages, athletics and knowledge based units.

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